I don’t know about you, but I’ve seen my fair share of epic meltdowns. All kids express themselves differently but mine are total reactors. From my boys fighting over who has to go in the shower first before bed, to the frustration of my daughter not being given the option of using a pink spoon (LOL!), the tantrums happen when you least expect it and they come on so fast!

These big emotions can feel like a tidal wave for us mama bears, who just want to coddle our kids and make all their worries go away! And we all obviously know that dealing with tantrums, meltdowns, and emotional outbursts is all part of the journey of raising children. But it can also be incredibly challenging and overwhelming at times, leaving us wondering what to do next. Sadly, many times it feels like no matter what we say or do, it’s as if our kids express themselves in a whole different language! I GET IT.

But here’s the good news: I’ve also learned a thing or two along the way, and I’m excited to share some coping strategies and techniques that have helped me support the way my kids express themselves in managing their emotions. Now, I’m no doctor, but from my experience as a mom of three, these 9 strategies can really help to navigate those big emotions your kiddos are feeling and bring back the sweetness, smiles, and calmness to your life! Because let’s face it, we all want to find ways to help our kids listen to their emotions and express themselves in healthy ways.

Stay Calm and Stay Present

When your child is experiencing a big emotion, it’s natural to feel overwhelmed or frustrated yourself. However, staying calm and composed is key to helping your child regulate their own emotions! Take a deep breath, ground yourself in the present moment, and remind yourself that this too shall pass. And please note: this is easier said than done, and be patient with yourself in the process :)

Validate Their Feelings

One of the most powerful ways to support your child is by validating their feelings. This helps your kids express their feelings in a positive way! Let them know that it’s okay to feel angry, sad, or frustrated, and reassure them that you’re there to help them through it. Because sometimes, all our kids need is for us to acknowledge their emotions. Use phrases like, “I can see that you’re feeling upset right now, and that’s okay. Let’s talk about what’s bothering you.” or “I see you’re really angry that we can’t find your toy truck and it’s gone now.” It validates their feelings and lets them know we’re there for them.

Practice Empathy

Empathy is a powerful tool for helping children feel understood and supported. Put yourself in your child’s shoes and try to see the situation from their perspective. Validate their feelings by saying something along the lines of “I understand why you’re feeling this way. It must be really hard for you.”

Use Calming Techniques

Teaching simple calming techniques to help your kids express their feelings and regulate their emotions is underrated. Sharing that deep breathing exercises, counting to ten, or using a sensory tool like a stress ball or fidget spinner can help tremendously helpful to your child. As a former teacher, I would encourage my students to use these techniques in school and at home whenever they felt like it necessary. I highly recommend you encourage your own kids to practice these techniques whenever they’re feeling overwhelmed. Mindfulness helps to focus on the present moment and regain control.

Create a Safe Space

Designate a special “calm down corner” or area in your home where your child can go when they need some time to themselves. Fill this space with comforting items like soft pillows, blankets, and their favorite toys! Encourage your child to use this space whenever they need to take a break, regroup their thoughts, and recharge their mind. It’s a true game-changer!

Teach Healthy Coping Strategies

Teach your kids how to deal with stress and frustration in positive ways. Assure them that while this is not always the easiest route to take – I mean, screaming on the top of your lungs at your loved ones seems much easier ;) – it is definitely the most productive. Taking a walk, practicing mindfulness, listening to music or talking about your feelings with a trusted friend or family member are all better options than some of the negative energy alternatives. Promise.

Redirect their Energy

Whether you have a 2-year-old or a 10-year-old, redirecting your child’s energy during a meltdown can be a great way to help your kids express their emotions in a more positive way. And yes, it’s not uncommon for 10-year-olds to still have temper-tantrums at that age, especially in the presence of their family and loved ones. Put on some music and dance it out together, sing silly songs, make funny faces, or even blow some raspberries to break the tension and bring a smile back. Don’t be afraid to get a little goofy, even with your older kids, mama! Sometimes a change of pace is all it takes!!

Offer Reassurance and Support

Let your child know that you’re always there for them, no matter what. Reassure them that it’s okay to make mistakes and that you love them unconditionally. Offer plenty of hugs, cuddles, and words of encouragement to help them feel safe and supported. You might be surprised by how quickly physical touch can make it so the tantrums become a thing of the past!

Read Books About Big Emotions

Reading books about big emotions can be a game-changer. Look for stories with characters who experience similar feelings and learn healthy coping mechanisms. It can help them see they’re not alone!

Final Thoughts

Dealing with big emotions is never easy, but by implementing these coping strategies and techniques, you can help your child develop essential emotional regulation skills that will serve them well throughout their lives! Please remind yourself that you’re doing the best you can in this wild parenting ride. There is no manual for us mamas and we just have to do the best we can, which I know we all are!! There will be meltdowns, there will be tears, but there will also be sunshine and laughter. By staying calm, using these tips, and offering a safe space for your kids to express themselves, we can help our babes weather any emotional rollercoaster! Amen to that!!


Want in on the secret weapon against the chaos: filling my kids’ emotional cups each and everyday. Because when you fill your child’s cup, life is better for the kids and the parents! I’m sharing a month’s worth of simple ways to fill up your children’s cups everyday! Go check them out!


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Featured Image Photo Credit: Shay James Photography

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